Janet hadn’t ever felt apprehensive with Wes, but she certainly did now.
Why, she wondered, was he looking at her like that, as if she weren’t dressed –or perhaps he was thinking of undressing her himself?--and why had he closed his bedroom door? Granted he hadn’t locked it, but still… why? It made her a tad uneasy. Did he plan on doing her harm? Had she inadvertently gotten him thinking of that sort of behavior just because of her wise-guy remark about the playboys? More importantly, was she now in trouble?
Damn it! Her father was right. She was too naïve for her own good and too trusting too. Her thoughts went zooming back to that uncharacteristically serious discussion she had had with her father. It was the last time she recalled really chatting with him. That was just a few weeks before her parents separated.
“Janet baby, come here a minute. I need to tell you something,” Jeffery had said looking unusually grave.
“Did I do something wrong, Daddy?” she asked allowing him to take her hand and pull her onto the couch next to him.
He smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. “When have you ever done anything wrong? You’re perfect.”
She giggled. “Silly Daddy.”
He stared at her for a long time his expression clouded. “You’re birthday’s coming up soon. Can’t believe you’re going to be sixteen! Kids just grow up too quick. You’re getting so pretty too, and that’s when the trouble starts,” he said ominously.
“Huh?” Janet said utterly confused. “How is getting pretty trouble?”
“Boys will start to notice you. They’ve already noticed your sister and that’s troubling enough, but you…”
“Wait, shouldn’t Jasmine be here too then to hear this?”
“I had this talk with her years ago, when she first started being boy crazy,” he said, frowning.
“So, like…when we were in kindergarten?” Janet said smiling impishly.
Jeffery laughed. “Not quite that far back, although, it might not have been a bad idea,” he retorted.
“Why did it take you so long to get to me?” she asked.
“It’s just…Jasmine and you are very different.”
“No, we’re not,” she said shaking her head.
“You are,” he said, now glancing over his shoulder and lowering his voice. “I’m going to tell you something, but you can’t tell Jasmine. It could hurt her feelings and I don’t want that.”
“Okay. What is it, Daddy?” she asked her eyes wide in wonder.
“You’re smarter than Jazzy. Book smart I mean. She’s more…savvy though. Do you understand?”
“No,” she said frowning now.
“You’re much more naïve,” he said softly.
“I…I am?” she squeaked.
“That’s not a bad thing,” he said quickly. “ It’s just…I worry about you.”
“You don’t worry about Jasmine?”
“Believe me, I do. fathers worry all the time about their daughters, especially when they’re boy crazy."
“But I’m not boy crazy, Daddy,” she said smiling. “You don’t have to worry.”
He gazed into her big brown eyes and smiled sadly. “No, not you,” he said wistfully. “You will have a boyfriend soon enough, though. So, I want to prepare you, so boys don’t get a chance to hurt you.”
Her eyes grew huge. “You think they’re gonna…what….break my arm or something?” she shrieked.
“Oh, baby, if it was only a broken arm. No, I’m talking about emotional hurt.”
“Um…okay,” she said, looking confused again.
“I’m sorry, I’m not doing this very well. Okay,” he said stealing himself. “This is the thing. Teenage boys are ruled by hormones.”
“Okay,” she repeated.
“Everything they do and say is for one reason, just one. To get what they want most of all,” Jeffery said staring intently into her eyes as if willing her to read his thoughts so he needn’t say the words aloud.
“Um…what do they want?”
Jeffery sighed. “What nature tells them they must do. To procreate.”
She gaped at him. “Wait, you’re telling me boys want to have babies?” she asked, incredulous.
He hung his head and muttered, “I’m making a mess of this. No, baby, they don’t actually want the babies. They just want to… to do the act which results in babies.”
She blinked a few times. “You mean sex,” she said boldly.
“Yes, Janet,” he said endlessly relieved.
“So, why do you think I gotta know this? I’m not gonna have sex! I belong to the To-thine-own-self-be-true-club,” she said.
He frowned. “A Shakespear club?”
“Why does everybody say that?” she said, rolling her eyes. “Has nothing to do with him. It’s a club for girls in school who just don’t want all that stupid sex stuff to spoil everything. Did I tell you? Amanda Barker is pregnant! Third girl this year. So stupid! With all the birth control out there and everything and still…”
“Honey, that’s just it. She probably had no intention of even having sex. Her boyfriend probably tricked her,” he said earnestly.
Janet gaped. “How do you know that?”
He suddenly looked very guilty. “It…it’s what they do,” he mumbled, looking away.
Janet stared at her father for a good long while. “Did…did you do that…when you were a teenager? Did you trick girls into having sex with you?” she asked, holding her breath. "Did you do that with Mom?"
“Janet,” he said grabbing her hand and squeezing it. “Not all boys are bad. That’s not what I’m saying. But the thing is, it’s hard to tell the good ones from the bad ones especially when you’re so young and inexperienced. Even the good ones are ruled by hormones, you know, and things can get out of hand so easily without any intent. Some guys are like that. They sweet talk and lie and tell you you’re the best girl in the world. They’ll do anything and say anything to …to get you to give in. They’ll even tell you they love you and maybe they believe it themselves cuz at that moment lust can feel like love and…”
“So, lust makes them lie to get sex. Okay, that makes sense,” she said.
“I just want you to be aware because a broken arm heals quickly enough but a broken heart…not so much and sometimes it never heals,” he said, his jaw clenched as he gently brushed his knuckles along her soft cheek. “I swear if any punk-ass kid hurts you, I’ll kill him! Do you understand?”
Much to his astonishment, Janet giggled and threw her arms around his neck. “Don’t worry, Daddy. I don’t ever need a boyfriend cuz I got you! You’ll never hurt me.”
Jeffery smiled and held her close, his heart swelling with love. “I’d sooner die, baby.”
Had it really been only 5 months ago? She had been so happy then. She loved her father beyond reason and then….Just a few weeks later her world was shattered when her parents had a blazing row and her mother kicked Jeffery out of the house.
Her heart pounded frantically as she watched Wes smile at her. That sexy smile, she thought suddenly, could be the equivalent of lies, couldn’t it? He needn’t even utter a word and he could get a girl flat on her back. She swallowed hard noticing as she did so, that her mouth was suddenly very dry and her hands shook.
Feigning a casual attitude she didn’t quite feel she moved around the room looking at anything but the large, comfy bed with the dark wood headboard. She focused on a poster of a pretty blonde St. Paulie girl on one wall. She glanced at a half-naked, seductively posing Jessica Alba on another poster and wondered if Wes saw Janet that way. Was Wes at this exact moment thinking of tossing her onto his bed and having his way with her? Her heart gave a little jump at the thought and when she felt Wes’ hands encircle her waist she actually did jump and backed away from him.
“What are you doing?” she asked, amazing herself to find her voice had not betrayed her nervousness.
“Nothing,” he said, predictably.
“That again,” she muttered then added in a clear yet playful voice, “You said you were going to be good.”
“I’m sure gonna try,” he retorted, that sexy grin in place as he took a step closer. “I wouldn’t want to disappoint my yenta.”
“Very funny. Are you thinking of doing nasty things to me?” she said casually, again taking a step back.
“Nasty, no. Awesome, definitely,” he retorted, taking a step closer and reaching for her.
She swiftly pulled away. “Let’s try that again. Are you planning on raping me?” she asked point blank.
He paused for a moment wondering if she was serious. He stared, but seeing her face lacking fear, he assumed she was kidding so he grinned. “The first girl I get into my bed will want to be there, I can assure you,” he said.
“Ah,” she said, nodding pensively. “So, it’s the second girl that’ll have to worry.”
He burst out laughing and grabbed her hand before she could evade him again. “You’re so much fun,” he said caressing her cheek and kissing the tip of her nose. He then released her, went to his desk and turned on the computer.
Janet didn’t know what to think of that move. Had her imagination run away from her? Had Wes never thought of harming her? Perhaps she wasn’t so naïve after all. Maybe she could trust him. Her father’s warning, however, still rang in her ears.
